Summer is going well. My baby is growing just right; we had another ultrasound done since the doctors were worried about the placenta being right on top of the cervix, and which might cause bleeding and complications at birth. The ultrasound showed the placenta had moved, the baby's head was right on the canal, and now the doctors are worried that the baby is too big :) She looked very healthy, most of her weight and height is in the high 80 percentile. We even saw some chubby rolls on her legs. She sure looks squished in the little space I can provide her, but my doctor said she has plenty of room to keep growing. At the moment she weighs 4lbs, and I'm in my 31 week of pregnancy. Both Elijah and I are hoping she comes early. I need her to, not only because I don't want to deliver a very big baby, but also that I'll be so busy as soon as school starts with Gillian being homeschooled and all three boys going to school, and myself having a myriad of other activities already scheduled for this coming semester. Needless to say, my kids are over the moon with excitement, and whether she comes early or not, we are all happy for her arrival.
Elijah is still searching for jobs. This month has been a trial of our faith; the fact that we have four kids at home and one coming, three adults, and no job in horizon has truly tested our patience and happiness, not to say our bank account. We keep praying, and Elijah keeps getting words of encouragement, and they are all good and sweet, but what we need is help with finding a job that can provide for this soon-to-be family of eight. I get frustrated with Heavenly Father for not helping my husband, who has always been an amazing husband, father, friend, son, brother, and who always tries to do the right thing for the Lord, and not for himself. I also get confused about how my God asked me to again forsake my dreams and goals to have more kids, and then we find ourselves with more kids but no job. I keep reading my scriptures and there are amazing blessings for His righteous sons and daughters, but my faith is not strong enough to believe them. Both Elijah and I have had trials in our individual lives, while we were single and then married, but this is the hardest we have had to endure. We have truly given all we have had to built the kingdom of God, whether be our time, our dreams, our money, our energy, but at the moment I really need God keep His side of the bargain.
I've had these feelings for a while during this month, and then last Sunday I had an interesting experience in the car driving for church. My kids had cleaned my car the day before and I was telling them how much I appreciated it. Jefferson then said that he had found so much junk in James's side of the car, but he failed to mention anything about his side of the car that was probably even worse than James's. In hopes of teaching him a lesson of not being so critical towards others, I shared with him Matthew 7:5 "Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then
shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye." Later on, as I always do when I teach Jefferson's something, because he is so similar to me, I try to think of what I said in my own terms. The thought came that I had been ungrateful to God for not having given me what I deemed necessary, forgetting or forsaking the incalculable blessings he has bestowed upon me. And the most amazing thing is I'm so blessed to have such an unbelievably wonderful family that love, care and respect each other. And even though that is not all I've been blessed with, it would still be enough. But just in case, here are some other blessings that I noticed this week:
My boys started their week with Cub Scout Day Camp. Charlton was disappointed that he couldn't go, but Gillian more than made up for it. They had a good time playing and reading with each other. Love at home is the greatest blessing one could desire.
Monday, while the boys went to their camp from 8-4, the rest of us went to running club, library, had lunch at Charlton's favorite restaurant, ran some errands, and enjoyed some ice cream after shopping at Costco. When we got back, we found the older boys laying down and sleeping, completely wiped out. Charlton joined them in their sweet slumber, while we ladies put the food up and prepared dinner. By the time evening came, I was utterly prostrated. I asked my very well rested boys to take care of the lesson for FHE, and they delivered an awesome shadow puppet show on the life of Moses (using their imagination and lego characters). Best way to close the day! Having children who love the gospel and know it, it's an occasion for thanksgiving.
On Tuesday, we decided to stay home during the day, since we had plenty to do later on. Elijah came and visited us for a little bit during lunch time, and Gillian was in heaven that she had her dad all to herself with older boys being gone at camp and Charlton playing in the computer with my mom. She quickly wrote a sweet message for her dad before he left that filled my eyes with tears. Because he is such a big part of their lives, my kids love and respect their dad, and that is worth more than any treasure out there.
In the afternoon, I took Gillian to her book club, where they discussed Oscar Wilde's children's book "The Happy Prince." When asked about the book, many girls shared their various thoughts, but my daughter was the one who nailed it by explaining the difference between joy and happiness. What an example of intelligence and beauty she is to me! She is humble and kind, thoughtful and bright, beautiful and modest! I love my sweet Gillian and I'm grateful for her. Now having a girl like Gillian for a daughter is truly a treasured blessing!
After the discussion, the girls made fairy gardens relating to one of the fables in the book. The girls had a lot of fun, and I enjoyed seeing their creative minds at work.
When we got back from her book club, my friend asked me if her daughter could spend some time with Gillian while she ran some errands. Without realizing that Gillian had a babysitting assignment that afternoon, I said yes. Gillian was mature enough to take care of the girl she was babysitting and make her friend feel welcomed. That dinner we had to feed six kids, and half of them wanted completely different food than what we were offering, not an easy task for any mom. It is a blessing that I've taught my kids that if they don't like what I cook they can make their own food; once seated I don't get up.
On Wednesday, after getting back from their camp, the boys went upstairs in their room and spent some time with Charlton playing legos and listening to books on tape. This little child of mine is so blessed to have loving siblings. He gets to be read by Gillian, gets to spend time on one-on-one with Jefferson, and listened to books-on-tape with James. He really makes me laugh when he says that his peers bore him because they don't know anything about Star Wars, Harry Potter, Percy Jackson, Magic Tree House stories, etc. He thinks he is a big boy because his siblings treat him as an equal.
That evening James asked Elijah to help him make some homemade popcorn, and James asked Charlton to join him in eating the tasty popcorn. It was so fun seeing my boys exploring the science of making popcorn together!
On Thursday, Charlton begged us to go back to the library. My mother and Charlton had received their library cards on Monday and they each had put books and videos on hold. Charlton kept asking everyday if his books had arrived and when I told him yes, he begged me to go and get them. Of course, I couldn't say no. Ever since then, he has been listening to his books-on-tape.
Friday was such a pretty day with a light breeze and warm sunshine that invited us to be outdoors. We accepted mother nature's invitation and took to the Botanical Garden in Berkeley. I love Heavenly Father's creations, and my favorite is sitting or walking through a refreshing garden and breathing the cool air and aromatic scent wafting from the vibrant flowers along the way. Gillian and Charlton had fun running around, and my mom kept impressing me with her knowledge of the trees and flowers, and especially of the many herbs planted in the Japanese garden. I enjoyed taking pictures of dewy branches, eye-catching flowers, ebullient streams, and of course my favorite subjects - my family.
We learned that the queen of the Andes, a flowering plant named Puya and which blooms very rarely, was in full glorious display at the garden. This is what the Botanical Garden had to say about this rare plant:
BERKELEY —
If you’re on the lookout for a special experience, the UC Botanical Garden has just the ticket. Its endangered Puya raimondii, a flowering plant not-so-modestly known as the Queen of the Andes, is in the process of producing a giant bloom that could shoot 30 feet high and feature up to 30,000 flowers. Its dramatic life cycle change happens in the wild only every 80 to 100 years.
Of course, I couldn't let this once in a lifetime opportunity slip away. It cost me though; the dazzling plant was located on top of the hill, the highest spot in the garden. I kept stopping on our ascend there, and Gillian kept helping me hold on her. She also kept teasing me about my out of breath experience of going to see just a plant, but in the end she understood my desire to show her that rare things are hard to come along, and when they do it takes hard work to appreciate them. She also asked if I ever enjoyed life without teaching a lesson. I told her learning is my enjoyment. I'm grateful for the love of learning that enkindles my very being's existence.
On Saturday, Elijah and I went to the Sacramento Temple, since our Oakland one is closed for cleaning. I had been wanting to visit the temple the whole month; when you attend it on a regular basis and feel of love of God embrace you, you really feel the need to go again. I didn't know if three hours in the car and three hours in the temple would completely wear me out, especially after my hike the day before, nonetheless we decided to give it a try since we both needed the engulfing love and comfort provided in the temple. I didn't receive any special revelation, but my burdens were lifted for a time, and my faith was restored. To have a piece of heaven on earth and the chance to feel of that heavenly serenity whenever we can - now that is veraciously a great gift!
Upon returning home, after being gone for hours, we were greeted by our cheerful children, each doing something productive and helping keep the house neat and organized. Having a home where the Spirit dwells with children who understand the importance of keeping our home as a temple is another special blessing I counted this week. Furthermore, when I happened upon this poem on my entering the house, my cup runneth over.
