I'm a woman Phenomenally. Phenomenal woman, that's me! - Maya Angelou

Busy week. Various activities. Loving moments. Tender feelings.  Profound discernment. That's what life is all about, one day in and one day out.  Making connections, touching lives, feeling loved, sharing kindness.  It takes time to enjoy the sort of life God has in store for you - our own inhibitions and dreams get on the way - but when we do, and when we use the same energy we would use if they were our own natural intentions, then we've conquered the world, and life, however hard, is always beautiful.  

Stress has been part of our life these past few months, fear for the future, uncertainty of employment, financial burdens, pregnancy sickness, keeping up with what the world is teaching our kids out there and trying to undo it with God's love and our protection, and many more.  It has been especially hard on my sweet husband, whose purity, modesty and faith is unparalleled.  As we pray together each day, as we think of each other's happiness, our hearts have become one, and our faith has binded us closer than ever. Our trials are still unsolved, but just like these succulents in the following pictures I took when I went with Jefferson in his field trip this week, these trials have helped Elijah and I produce unique and beautiful flowers  - a stronger faith, deeper love for each other, respect, endurance, hope, happiness in face of hardships, gratitude.  These few months have been the hardest tribulations so far in our life, and although they are still unresolved and luring in our minds day after day, I feel Elijah and I have already conquered them.  We are one and stronger than before, and we know things will work out.  God is on our side, and we are on His!

This Wednesday, a great woman passed away.  Maya Angelou was an inspiration to countless women of many generations.  Her passion for life, her outspoken personality, her strong spirited words, and her faith in the betterment of human life made her an example of a woman who chose to be better than what life had dealt her.  I admired her and will continue to learn from her example as expressed in her poems, autobiographies, and countless speeches she gave to women all over the world.  Here is an article from Huffington Post magazine:

 

Maya Angelou, the beloved author, poet and activist who passed away on Wednesday May 28, was even more "phenomenal" than the words of one of her most famous poems can express.
During her 86 years, she wrote seven autobiographies, was active in the civil rights movement and worked with the likes of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., recited a poem at Bill Clinton's 1993 presidential inauguration, became a college professor, befriended Oprah and was awarded the 2011 Presidential Medal of Freedom -- the list goes on. (As the NYTimes obituary points out, before her first autobiography, I Know Why The Caged Bird Sings, was published in 1969, Angelou had already been "a dancer, calypso singer, streetcar conductor, single mother, magazine editor in Cairo, [and] administrative assistant in Ghana.")
In celebration of her incredible life, here are 11 lessons all women can learn from Maya Angelou:

1. Loving someone means risking everything -- but it's always worth it.
"In the flush of love's light, we dare be brave. And suddenly we see that love costs all we are, and will ever be. Yet it is only love which sets us free." -"Touched By An Angel"

2. Women need to support each other.
"Each time a woman stands up for herself, without knowing it possibly, without claiming it, she stands up for all women."

3. The key to success is simple: enjoyment.
“Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it.”

 4. Make changes where you can, but accept the things that you have no control over.
“If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude. Don't complain.”

5. Trust your own voice and instincts.

 6. Learn the value of forgiveness.
“It’s one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself, to forgive. Forgive everybody.”

7. Looks aren't everything. Not even a little bit.
“Pretty women wonder where my secret lies. I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size But when I start to tell them, They think I'm telling lies. I say, It's in the reach of my arms The span of my hips, The stride of my step, The curl of my lips. I'm a woman Phenomenally. Phenomenal woman, That's me.” -"Phenomenal Woman"

8. Dare to "kick ass."
“I love to see a young girl go out and grab the world by the lapels. Life's a bitch. You've got to go out and kick ass.”

 9. If you're in a bad living situation, relationship or job, get out now.
"Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman."

10. Always remember to laugh.
"Women should be tough, tender, laugh as much as possible, and live long lives."

11. How you make people feel is the mark you will leave behind.
"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel."



Here is also one of my favorite poems among many that Maya Angelou wrote during her long life:
A Brave and Startling Truth by Maya Angelou

 We, this people, on a small and lonely planet
Traveling through casual space
Past aloof stars, across the way of indifferent suns
To a destination where all signs tell us
It is possible and imperative that we learn
A brave and startling truth

And when we come to it
To the day of peacemaking
When we release our fingers
From fists of hostility
And allow the pure air to cool our palms

When we come to it
When the curtain falls on the minstrel show of hate
And faces sooted with scorn are scrubbed clean
When battlefields and coliseum
No longer rake our unique and particular sons and daughters
Up with the bruised and bloody grass
To lie in identical plots in foreign soil

When the rapacious storming of the churches
The screaming racket in the temples have ceased
When the pennants are waving gaily
When the banners of the world tremble
Stoutly in the good, clean breeze

When we come to it
When we let the rifles fall from our shoulders
And children dress their dolls in flags of truce
When land mines of death have been removed
And the aged can walk into evenings of peace
When religious ritual is not perfumed
By the incense of burning flesh
And childhood dreams are not kicked awake
By nightmares of abuse

When we come to it
Then we will confess that not the Pyramids
With their stones set in mysterious perfection
Nor the Gardens of Babylon
Hanging as eternal beauty
In our collective memory
Not the Grand Canyon
Kindled into delicious color
By Western sunsets

Nor the Danube, flowing its blue soul into Europe
Not the sacred peak of Mount Fuji
Stretching to the Rising Sun
Neither Father Amazon nor Mother Mississippi who, without favor,
Nurture all creatures in the depths and on the shores
These are not the only wonders of the world

When we come to it
We, this people, on this minuscule and kithless globe
Who reach daily for the bomb, the blade and the dagger
Yet who petition in the dark for tokens of peace
We, this people on this mote of matter
In whose mouths abide cankerous words
Which challenge our very existence
Yet out of those same mouths
Come songs of such exquisite sweetness
That the heart falters in its labor
And the body is quieted into awe

We, this people, on this small and drifting planet
Whose hands can strike with such abandon
That in a twinkling, life is sapped from the living
Yet those same hands can touch with such healing, irresistible tenderness
That the haughty neck is happy to bow
And the proud back is glad to bend
Out of such chaos, of such contradiction
We learn that we are neither devils nor divines

When we come to it
We, this people, on this wayward, floating body
Created on this earth, of this earth
Have the power to fashion for this earth
A climate where every man and every woman
Can live freely without sanctimonious piety
Without crippling fear

When we come to it
We must confess that we are the possible
We are the miraculous, the true wonder of this world
That is when, and only when
We come to it.


On Thursday, Charlton accompanied me to my doctor appointment.  It was the sweetest thing.  He kept looking at these baby magazines, and would continuously call my attention to various baby furniture and other baby items advertized in the magazine.  I loved it when he would ask "what color crib would the baby like? What stuffed animal would my sister enjoy most?  Do we need this changing table?  I really like these book shelves; my baby sister would need her own books to read."  When the doctor came in, he was fully engrossed in the pages of baby magazines, but as soon as he heard the baby's heartbeat, he was so astonished, wide-eyed, and couldn't believe his ears.  I'm so glad my sweet children are so excited about their new baby sister.  I love it that Charlton comes and "hugs the baby" every few moments.  I love it that Gillian speaks and sings to the baby whenever she gets a chance.  I have so much fun hearing Jefferson and James making plans who is going to come to the hospital first and hold the baby.  I'm touched when I hear excitement in my husband's voice when he feels one of her kicks.  I'm grateful for the little things that make life exiting, sweet, and full of joy.

On Friday, all of my older kids received awards. I was invited to the award ceremony for them, as well as collect my own volunteering awards.  As I returned home later on, I couldn't stop laughing at each of us, at how unique we all are, and how we each respond to awards.  Here is what my kids said:

After apologizing to James for being late at his ceremony, he said: "No worries, mom.  I'm so glad you came.  This award wouldn't mean anything without you here." - Adoring, loving James!

Jefferson, with a smirk on his face: "Did you notice I was the only one with three awards in the whole school?" - Competitive, confident Jefferson.

As I was trying to teach Jefferson to be a bit more humble, this is what came from my mouth: "Did you notice I had three awards and a gift card?" - The apple doesn't fall far from the tree

Gillian, after hearing me praise her for her hard work and how proud I was for her awards, said: "You know these awards are just ways to please and appease parents, right?!" - Too smart for her own good.

On Saturday, Gillian and I went to see the new movie Maleficent.  It was beautifully created, and we loved all of the twists and turns.  Costume design was striking, and the story well written.  After that we went swimming for 6 hours, till 8:00 pm.  When we arrived home, I found my wonderful husband had done all the laundry, and the clean clothes covered my couch, which means I've got to finish this post soon so I can go and take care of the folding.  Till next time...

Just an old-fashioned summer

One morning while cooking, I see through my kitchen window my two older boys playing up in their favorite tree. They had accumulated all of their arsenal of weapons accompanied by radios and ropes, and had placed them in the tree. They were pretending to be frontiersman fighting the Brits in the Revolutionary war. On the other side of the yard, I noticed Gillian had gathered all of the cardboard boxes in one place and transformed them into a little shelter. She had placed an umbrella in front of it and a sign that said "Hotel du Monde." Gillian was joined by Charlton. My children were there playing with each other for over two hours, uninterrupted and without any fights. I felt so grateful that, at a time when technology and extra curriculum activities have almost made us forget what an old fashioned summer could look like, my kids have kept alive the innocence of childhood.


Here are some of the activities we have participated this week:

The children are loving the running club. Gillian and James have each finished 20 miles so far, five miles each Monday. As for Jefferson, he seems to be competing with time; he has accomplished 35 miles so far, and wants to go faster each time. After running, I take them to the library to cool off. While I look for my own books or visit my favorite corner, the books on sale, they sit and read. This Monday when I was done with my own search, I found them all sitting next to each other reading, after having filled their bags with books. I had to take a picture.


Another fun activity that reoccurs a lot in our home, which I'm sure you have noticed, is dress-up games. This week's picture award goes to Charlton. The older boys had dressed him up and as always Charlton loved the attention. Here is my cowboy decked up with all the necessaries - gun, knife, radio, ax, rope, hat, and of course a cowboy bandanna.


Play dates have become easier as my kids grow older. With the exception of setting them up which I do, they take care of all of their friends' entertaining. Even James has become quite the host and helper, especially when there are little kids around, and the older ones have attached themselves with Gillian or Jefferson. I love it that he is always willing to help and make them happy. Here is James teaching Charlton and Caroline how to build puzzles. They were on the floor quietly making puzzle after puzzle for at least an hour.


One of our other usual activities is swimming. I've taken the kids swimming three or four times a week, and they love it. It gives them a chance to be cool, play with friends, and practice their skills. As for me, I've enjoyed talking to my friends. When we went a couple of days ago, something fantastic happened - Charlton decided to enter the water and swim with me. I had him in a floaty, but even then he needed my hand. However little, this was progress. Hopefully, next year he will start to swim and follow his brothers around, since that's all he wants to do. For now, we'll get him swimming with me and his little friends, and sunbathe with his brothers:

Cooking is going great with my kids. They love it, especially my boys. I had them help me as I prepared six loaves of banana bread to take to friends. James was particularly eager to help and wanted to know in advance to whom we were taking the loaves. He seemed to be a bit more attentive when he knew the person we were making that particular batch for. As for Jefferson, I have to say it is eery how similar to me he is. He didn't need any help and wanted to do it all on his own. He told me he would ask me if he needed help. So I stood by and just observed. All the loaves turned out great, and my boys know how to make banana bread now. What more can you ask from life!

I had been concentrating on teaching my boys laundry and cooking, because being a female it comes easy to Gillian to do any of that. I know it isn't always true for all girls, but domestic chores are performed quickly by Gillian. Being the first child helps I guess in being effective and skillful. However, she has an attitude problem. When I ask my boys for help they seem genuinely excited to cook or learn a new skill. Gillian would rather hire a maid and read all day and night. I know it sounds familiar, but that kind of disturbed me a little. I need her to enjoy working as well. So, when her turn to cook this week approached, I got exited and made a big deal on how we were going to eat a delicious meal made by the best cook in town, and let her cook whatever she wanted. She took it seriously and cooked her favorite meal, spaghetti with meat sauce. Fortunately Elijah had cooked the ground beef the day before so she didn't have to deal with any great cooking. My favorite part of my daughter's cooking however is the fact that she insists in wearing an apron, and that she cleans up the counters after she is done cooking. Moments like these find me surprised to see that I have a ten year old daughter who cleans, and cooks and reads and writes and sings... It feels that it wasn't that long ago when I was that age, when in fact I'm a mother of four growing children. Life is a wonder! How it manages to teach us maturity and responsibility while at the same time allowing us to keep our innocence and child-like curiosity, it will always be a mystery to me.


Our favorite activity that the kids and I love doing is visiting friends, and this week we drove a little bit longer than usual to see the Wiederholds, who moved three weeks ago to Sacramento area. My kids loved being with their friends, exploring their new home, chatting, playing and sharing their love for each other. I had missed Amy and her sunny disposition, and it was a joy to feel of her love and friendship. My friend Laura and her children joined us, and we had a wonderful time sharing our latest with each other. Next time we'll be doing an over-nighter, and my kids are already making plans on how they are going to spend their time with their friends. James told me that since he is going to marry Zoe, he needs to see her a bit more often. When I told him that once a month is as often as I can do with school starting soon and other activities already planned, he kind of sighed, and then said to me "I just hope I don't have to share her with anybody else while we visit." This is my 6 year old James! Shocking! Beware of the quiet ones!

Since summer is going so well for me and my children, I've had plenty of time to read and write. Furthermore, I've enjoyed watching a lot of movies and show. For the past two or three weeks, I've been hooked on movies from India and from France. The Indian movies are so pleasing to the eye (the Indian ladies are just drop dead gorgeous) and the ones I watch are all about love and family. The colors, the music, the beauty of this people, just fascinates me. And they don't tire me. When I'm feeling for light entertainment, nothing dramatic emotionally, I just watch one of those fun Indian family movies. The French movies are a bit deeper and they treat serious themes. But they also portray ordinary people with ordinary troubles, nothing glamorous or too unreal. At least the ones I've watched lately. Two come to mind, the Indian version of Emma, called Aisha, and a very good French movie, "Certified Copy" with Juliette Binoche.

However, as always the Brits have done it again. There is nothing better to me that Masterpiece Theater productions. I have thoroughly enjoyed the new version of Great Expectations with Gillian Anderson portraying Miss Havisham in a quite original way.


Then I was taken back when BBC combined great plot and characters with great actors. It helped that Rufus Sewell is one of the most handsome actors alive, but that's another plus. Zen took place in the streets of Italy with Rufus playing the stylish detective Zen who is honest but brilliant and who despite his Armani suits is quite sentimental and down-to-earth. I really enjoyed all three series, and I was very upset that BBC hadn't renewed the contract for a new season. It was better than any other detective stories out there. I liked that it wasn't gruesome, but intelligent and sweet.

My last recommendation is very special to me. During high school years I didn't have time to watch much T.V., but there was one show that my mother and I wouldn't miss, Inspector Morse. John Thaw was a member of our family each week, and we couldn't help but love the blue eyed Inspector who had a head for puzzles, an eye for observation, an ear for the opera, and a taste for beer. Ah, and I forgot - not only he was smart, but he was sensitive and sincere, albeit a bit cranky. What more can you want from a character?! Well, after the death of Inspector Morse and John Thaw, the actor who played him, the sequel with his sidekick, Inspector Lewis, followed. This summer is their sixth season. Unexpectedly, we, the fans of Inspector Morse. got to be surprised with a new show called Endeavour, which is in fact the first given name of Morse. Endeavour introduces us to the young Inspector, at this time just a regular constable who has left Oxford and quit the navy, and joined the police force. I loved everything about this new show. The actor playing the young Morse did a marvelous job, especially knowing that he had to fill big shoes. The plot was very Morse-ish, and they introduced new characters that were interesting and complex. I just read that they are working on making a few more episodes this summer.

That's that for movies and shows. I'll write later about books I've been reading these past months. How is your summer going? What are some of your favorite shows? Books? Movies?

How does rain make you feel?

It has been raining on and off here in our beautiful California. We really need the rain. This year we've had very little precipitation. The sun has shined brightly all through winter. It must be this fact (having great weather all the time) that makes us stay at home when it rains. Elijah and I went on a date the other evening (and it was Saturday!) and there were very few people frequenting restaurants or walking around. Based on this unscientific fact, I can infer that I've become a California girl myself. For the past two weeks, my mornings have been spent entirely at home, and I'm happy to announce that I truly took pleasure in it. After reading to Charlton for an hour, every morning for five days in a row, I read and read and read. I finished five books in five days. I did stop to pay attention to my children, their after school activities, homework, and dinner (which I'm not ashamed to admit on occasion consisted of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches), but after they were in bed, my reading marathon would continue. You'll have to wait till the end of the month for the list and review of the books I read.

The week after didn't bring much change either. I did take care of the accumulated laundry and cooked some healthy dinners, but at night I started watching movies instead, taking a break from reading. As you might have noticed so far this year I've become obsessed with Downton Abbey, reading and watching BBC productions of any novel by Charles Dickens or George Elliot, and Shakespeare adaptations by Kenneth Branagh. As with other movies and productions before, I would stay up all night till I finished all of the episodes. This was very entertaining, but as you might have imagined a bit tiring especially when you have to chauffeur and feed four active kids the next day. Well that knowledge didn't deter me from doing the same thing this past week. Except that I obtained two new obsessions. The first one: the BBC adaptation of Sherlock Holmes mysteries into a new and amazing 21 century version. I had watched the first season some time ago and had thoroughly enjoyed it. I hadn't found the time to watch the second season, so one night I just sat and watched it all. I wasn't disappointed. With the exception of some unnecessary adult content (still in the realm of pg-13 ratings), season two was brilliantly done. I loved the plots, the energy coming from the actors--especially Benedict Cumberbatch who plays Sherlock--the costumes, the settings, and the chemistry between the two friends, Sherlock and Watson. I also think that Cumberbatch portrays Sherlock with a touch of understated humanity that makes our hearts want him to be happy. But as with most geniuses, Sherlock is misunderstood and feels alone, until Watson comes along, and they share a bond of friendship that is as unreal in appearances as it is real in their hearts. Solving mysteries and working together is just the beginning; forging that friendship is the story of this adaptation. I highly recommend it.
The other obsession I acquired still has to do with movies, this time with French movies. I spent a couple of nights being refreshed by the simplicity of the themes as well as the easy-going acting of the French actors and directors. Elijah and I like to watch foreign films, and my favorite ones are French. I remember watching The Chorus and being fascinated by it. This time I watched some movies with special themes such as having faith in yourself (Queen to Play), learning how to be a friend to others and allow you selfishness fade away (My Best Friend), believing in love by overcoming your own weaknesses (Jet Lag), being honest with yourself and others (The Valet), appreciating others even when they are different (The Dinner Game). I'll keep you posted when I find some more, and if you have some that have impressed you, let me know. Everyone loves a good movie.
Beside reading books and watching movies, I've enjoyed having lunches with friends, going on dates with Elijah, attending the temple, participating in our Relief Society activities, visiting the library, taking Charlton to story hour, driving the kids to their after-school programs, going on field trips with my kids, doing a whole lot of laundry, cleaning, cooking, and the usual. One activity in particular that I enjoyed tremendously comes to mind: Book club. My friend who was presenting Wednesday Wars assigned us each a part in Julius Caesar Act III, and everyone of us took our role very seriously, dramatized the way we felt it, and had a bunch of fun in the process. I was providently given the part of Mark Antony, truthfully my favorite part in Julius Caesar. We also discussed our favorite teachers, poignant moments in our lives, love stories, and many more. It was an unforgettable evening accompanied by delicious food and home made cream puffs. What more can one want from life!

Every new season, I feel the itch to go and shop for new outfits. It's as if I'm welcoming that new season by dressing appropriately for it. I always enjoy shopping at the stores, although I have to say shopping on-line is very tempting. This time amongst other things, I made myself buy a pair of sweat pants. I've never owned a pair before with the exception of my pregnancy free breathing pants. The reason behind my lack of desire to dress in sweatpants is the fact that I like to dress nicely at all times of the day, and so I buy only clothes that are fancy and nice. Well, staying home during the day these past weeks made me realize that I don't have any comfortable pants I can sit and read in. I have very comfortable pajamas, but I hate wearing them all day long. So the decision was made and I did buy them, although I chose a pair that wasn't just comfortable. They had to be sexy and fancy.

The other day when I got back from finishing some errands, I shockingly noticed a swarm of bees snuggling around each other on a branch in one of the trees near my parking place. I had to park in a different spot since I didn't want them to be disturbed. Elijah mentioned that they weren't our bees; this was a swarm all on its own. I was scared to get close, but not scared enough to not take one picture of this amazing phenomena.

Today we received a package from Elijah's grandmother. She had sent us each our own hat. Knowing how obsessed my children are with hats, this was a perfect gift for them. It is a blessing to have family members who are thoughtful and generous.
The forecast predicts more rain in our zone. I'm glad of it. I look forward to those quiet hours in the morning when I'm reading to Charlton or to myself, or playing Zingo for the hundredth time. Life is exciting only if you see it as such. Rain or shine, there are bound to be some thrilling experiences waiting to be discovered.

What have you been reading lately? What are your favorite movies? How do you feel when it rains?

Braces and Fairies

Gillian got her braces this week, front teeth upper jaw. She has a bad overbite and the orthodontist was adamant about taking care of that now. She is very excited about it, but I can tell they don’t feel very comfortable. She chose color green to match her eyes, she said.

I can’t believe we’ve had to start with orthodontic work at such an early age. I thought I had a few more years of traveling before I had to use that money for dental work, but it has to be done. What is interesting is the fact that the dentist said she might need more braces at a later time. I’m just glad we live at a time when braces are hip and our needs and those of our children’s are taken seriously and meticulously.

Jefferson wasn’t outdone when it came to dental work this week. He had two more teeth pulled out to make room for his adult teeth waiting to come out. He is done for a while till his adult teeth come out, and then we’ll go from there. Hopefully this preventive step we took of pulling baby teeth out will help his adult teeth to come out straight and with enough room.

James has been saying he has FOUR baby teeth that are loose. I read him the book D.W. tricks the Tooth Fairy (where D.W. is jealous of Arthur’s fallen tooth), and then complimented him on his pearly teeth. I told him I was very proud of his diligence in brushing and flossing every night. I think he received the attention he was seeking. As for Charlton, we are just happy he lets us brush his teeth; he has no ambition in that front, at least not yet.

Gillian spent some one-on-one time with dad on Saturday. She helped him wash his truck, and then when the job was done, they drove to Jamba Juice and spent some time with each other talking and slurping their smoothies.

Jefferson also got to spend some quality time with his dad. They have been working on a computer game called Minecraft, a game of building and strategy. His friend Jack introduced Jefferson to it, and Jefferson has been obsessed with it ever since. At one point James lost their place in this web world, and Jefferson became very distressed, but Elijah searched one night all the possible ways to find your way back, and helped Jefferson get back to where he wanted to be. This made Jefferson exclaimed how grateful he was to have such a smart dad to help him and such a sweet mom to let him work on it even though it was not his computer day. James and Gillian have been enjoying it as well, but this is Jefferson’s thing with dad.

I felt bad that James messed up Jefferson’s game and because of that they were giving him hard time. I decided he needed some fun time with mom, so I took him to play for a couple of hours at a fun place called Fairyland. It’s a very small and modest version of Disney World, but it was still very fun. They say it was when he visited this park that Walt Disney came up with his idea of Disney Land many years ago. We went from one nursery rhyme landmark to another. I told James that since this was his day he could lead us anywhere he wanted. I was touched when he would say let’s go and try this and that because Charlton will like it. James’s favorite place was Captain Hook’s pirate ship where he pretended to be Peter Pan. Charlton got excited when he saw a gnome blowing bubbles, as well as Snow White surrounded by her elves. Charlton had to give his princess a hug. We ended our experience by watching a puppet show that was offered every two hours in one of the outdoor playhouses inside the park. We didn’t want to leave, but we had to pick up the older kids from school.

Charlton has been enjoying this beautiful weather by going to the park every day. I figured that after reading to him the best thing was to take him outside and let him play.

He is very funny, this one. He loves to play by himself or with friends as long as he chooses to do so. And unlike my other children who loved climbing ladders and going down slides by age 18 months, Charlton has no desire or courage to do so. He is satisfied playing in the sand box or climbing steady steps. He loves trying anything as long as his siblings are with him. Let’s hope his sense of adventure will emerge soon, otherwise I’ll have to bribe him to try new things. Although I did try just that when he was taking an awful long time going down the slide the other day, but it didn’t work. I told him I would give him one piece of candy if he went down on his own. But it didn’t do the trick. He was scared that he would fall and asked me to put my arms around the bottom of the slide. You should have seen his face as he was going down. I wouldn’t have thought Charlton would be the careful one out of my four children. His physic just doesn’t match up with this side of his personality.

I haven’t been feeling that well for a few days. I think I had a mild cold, but my whole body ached and my nose was stuffed. As a result, I didn’t feel like doing much, which is ridiculous because as the mother and the CEO of the family I can’t afford feeling like that. I had to take kids to school and after school activities, dentist appointments, grocery shopping, park, reading time, story time, and many more. So the only area I could slack was laundry. Well, as you might have guessed, even that caught up with me. One morning after the boys had taken a shower, they came downstairs with their upper body dressed and the other half wrapped in towels. They informed me that there were no more clean underwear. I sat them to eat their breakfast as they were, with towels wrapped around their bottoms, and then went and search up and down for clean underwear. Well, needless to say, there weren’t any, so I had some washed and dried. While waiting for underwear to get done, my boys played UNO with each other on the floor. It was sad, but very funny at the same time. I decided I would hide a stack of clean underwear just for these kinds of emergencies. We were late for school not more than five minutes. I’ve never washed and dried underwear in less than 15 minutes. I thought they got washed long enough, and the boys didn’t know the difference.

During my sick days, besides reading a storm, I’ve been watching good BBC productions. Since I was in a Charles Dickens reading groove, and especially after watching Nicholas Nikleby, I was happy to see that PBS was showing a new adaptation of Oliver Twist artfully done by Masterpiece Theater.

Oliver Twist was the first Charles Dickens novel I read, and I was very young then. As I watched this production, I couldn’t help sadness come inside me knowing that there was such cruelty in the world toward children. I have no doubt that it still goes on in many countries even nowadays. I’m sure that when I read this novel at my young age of 10, I thought this was just that, a novel. But today I knew and felt the meanness of people and hardships of the children then and now. After the movie, I read a few articles about Charles Dickens, and his influence in improving children’s life conditions. He truly had a lasting effect on his audiences, and it was partially through his books that Queen Victoria was introduced to the harsh realities of the working class life. Oliver Twist was the first book ever to have a child for a main character. It was a stark reminder of the harsh working conditions of young children, the poor standard of orphanages, and the deep gap, not only financially but emotionally as well, between the working class and the wealthy. However, as all of Dickens’s books do for me, Oliver Twist brought out the importance of being kind to each other regardless of color, social status or wealth. We are truly each other’s angles on earth.

March 8 is the International women’s day. In Albania, this was mostly Mother’s day. I have the fondest memory of my brother and I going and getting my mother a special gift. Even at a young age, I loved writing her cards. They are not much, just expression of love for my mother, but they mean so much to her especially now that I’m not there. We also used to get for her each year a bouquet of mimosa flowers with their sweet smell permeating the whole house. My brother, being there in Albania at the moment, had arrived yesterday at her doorstep with an armful of mimosa and then taken her out for dinner as it used to be our tradition. She had tears of joy and gratitude in her eyes.

That made me think of the little things that make us mothers happy. A note, a flower, a meal cooked with love, a kiss and a hug, a smile, an encouragement, a foot rub, an honest praise, a simple, but thoughtful gift, are but a few that make me happy as a mother.

As I was thinking about my mother yesterday, and in particular of the blessing of motherhood, I felt this clear thought and gratitude in my heart. As my children are growing up, I’ve been thinking a lot of my life and my goals and what I need to do now to get there later. I’ve felt inadequate for the work force and even going back to school sounds hard at the moment, which I thought was my forte. I felt that being a mother hadn’t helped me much in my professional development. And then the Lord sent me one of his tender mercies. I had this clear vision in my mind of the woman I had become because I had chosen to be a mother and stay home with my children. There is no professional job out there that could have helped me develop the skills and the character traits that I’ve been able to develop as I’ve served my children and my family. Those character traits are eternal and will be with me forever. I’ve not only developed strengths that make it easy for me to administer life in its practical everyday issues, but I’ve developed and continue to develop through service and stretching of myself a clear vision of what my potential as a daughter of God is. I’ve seen myself become more humble, service oriented, kinder, more patient, more loving, more forgiving, more understanding than I would have ever become if I had taken a professional job. The act of letting go of yourself and putting the needs of others above yours, the act of working hard without any immediate rewards, the becoming someone somehow invisible to the world in order to make something way more than just visible (our children), in fact eternal, is something that cannot be named or put a price tag on. Being a mother has prepared me and continues to prepare me to achieve my eternal potential. It has made me a better person. Now that is worth more than any degree on earth.

On this day when we celebrate women of yesterday and today, I salute every woman who has had an impact in my life: my mother, my mother-in-law, my friends, my teachers, my woman authors, artists, philosophers, scientists, politicians, religious leaders, my daughter, grandmothers, and cousins. Wherever you may be, may your life be enriched by someone as you have enriched mine.