My forever family

My forever family

Thursday, March 29, 2012

She brings a smile to my face, too.

"I'm so happy every time I lay my eyes on you!" says Gillian as she climbs in the car when I pick her up from school. "Come on, Gillian, don't be so dramatic"-is my reply. "No really, mom. Your face radiates kindness and makes me smile."-and then she proceedes to tell me about her day and how much she missed me and how I'm the only person who makes her happy along with father, and how she wished all people were kind and nice to each other. If this was the first time that she said these, I would probably think something happened that day at school. But she has a smile every time I pick her up, flatters me with her love, and always tells me about her day, some good and some okay. I must confess that when my child tells me how happy she is to be with me, I've a strong desire to homeschool her right away. At this age, homeschooling sounds so much fun: reading and talking about books, history, science; visiting art museums together; attending shows and concerts; writing stories and sharing them; learning new skills together; having all the extra-curriculum classes during the morning instead of late afternoon, and having the rest of the day for free time and play. It sounds like a dream, especially when that dream brings joy to my daughter. It is very tempting and I'm truly considering it, along with a bunch of other dreams.

Homeschooling or not, I expect my kids to develop their talents and had fun at the same time. Gillian just finished an art class that she really enjoyed. I don't think she learned many new things, but she had a great time working on various project that involved primary colors and imagination, her two artistic strengths. The first project sounds like a lot of fun for all ages. It's a take from Andy Warhol's Ten Marilyns. Gillian drew the face of a dog and then she traced it four times on four squares. After that, she used different water paint to fill them in. The second project was based more on the child's imagination in the usage of color to create something from reality. Sunset at the Beach was what Gillian came up with. We see so many gorgeous sunsets here in California that it was easy for Gillian to remember the colors she needed to use.


I've almost run out of reading ideas for Gillian. She has read all of the classics for her age up to 12 years old. Further than that I'm worried she will be introduced to more than her emotional maturity is ready for. I've been researching a lot of young adult books as well as reading some of them. There are a lot of well-written contemporary books out there that her age group (10-12) can truly enjoy. Amongst others, she just finished The Wednesday Wars and The Invention of Hugo Cabaret. I had read them both previously, and I highly recommend them for ages 8-12. Jefferson is almost finished with Hugo as well and he really loves it.


Speaking of appropriate books, we hardly escaped the Hunger Games hysteria at our home unscathed. Gillian begged me to read all the books in the trilogy, and although I didn't want her to read any of them, I yielded to a compromise. I allowed her to read only the first one for now. Jefferson asked to read it too, and I had to put my foot down in his case. He then proceeded to tell Gillian that he wasn't worried; he would eventually catch up with her since mom was letting him read older kids books at an earlier age than her. He has decided he will be reading Harry Potter as soon as he turns eight (our rule with Gillian was she could read Harry Potter at 9 years old). This has made Gillian feel prompted to give me advice on raising kids and on being careful what I introduced them to. I'm usually not a person who reads self-help books, and I'm definitely happy not to have a set rules on being a parent, but on occasions such as these I wished I had some kind of manual I could consult. I'm sure I'll be in more dire need when teenage issues make their appearence. For now, I'll learn how to compromise on little things, and stand strong on the more important things of life. And let Gillian give me a piece of her mind.


At school Gillian has been working on a mission report and project for almost a month. Her mission she was assigned is the San Buenaventura Mission. She has been stressed out in wanting to get it all done on time and in perfect order. I told her not to worry that I wouldn't be disappointed if she didn't get a perfect score (I just didn't want to do the work that was required to get a perfect score, truth be told), but then she surprised me in saying something that every parent longs to hear. She said: "I'm not worried in disappointing you. I'm worrying I'll disappoint myself. I want to do well. I want to get the perfect score because I know I can do it." Who needs the parenting manual now?!

Here is a picture of her finished project. I was heavily involved in cutting and gluing and Gillian worked on drawing, coloring, decorating and putting pressure on me. It was worth it though; I earned a higher level of respect from Gillian, and especially from my architect son, Jefferson, who wants me now to work with him on fun building projects every week-end.

These past weeks haven't been only work for Gillian. Last week her class went on a field trip to the Conservatory of Flowers and had a tour guide tell them about plant adaptations. We saw various flowers and plants that adopted to their environment in astonishing and very original ways. I couldn't help but feel the power of God's wisdom in His creations. To have plants with no actual brain cells work their surroundings and what God has given them to their benefit is beyond fascinating to me. I wish I had enough time in this life to learn about how things are created and connected, but there is so much one can learn. No worries. There is always the next life.
After the tour, we took the kids outside and let them eat lunch and play in the grassy lawn. The sun was shining and a light breeze touched our skin.
I enjoyed relaxing and seeing my daughter playing sweetly with her friends. I think it is because of her innocence and kindness that all of her friends who are boys feel comfortable playing with her. And of course because she has a grand imagination worthy of any boy's attention. Just today I went to say 'hello' to her during lunch time, and she was telling them a story and had everyone's attention. She was the only girl at the table; the rest of the girls were out in the school playground probably talking to each other about boys. I laughed out loud at the scene.

I'm happy I'm Gillian's mother. She brings me joy, and yes, I'm more so happy when I lay eyes on her.

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Rain, rain, come again, little Charlton and James love to play!

I've never seen anyone so excited about the rain as Charlton is. If there is rain, you are bound to find him outside splashing the puddles with his bare feet. He insists in having no shoes on and rarely wears a coat. He tells me he wants "rain in his hair" so I let him, and then ask Gillian to give him a bath after he has had enough of that rain soak more than his hair.When he isn't outside playing in the rain, he loves to read. Right now we are in a Dr. Seuss reading marathon. He is very fond of them, and when we went to the library the other day we cleaned the library out of Dr. Seuss' books. An apology in advance to all of you whose child got upset for not finding any of those books. After I read to him for an hour or so, and if we don't have any errands to run or story time to attend, I let Charlton play on his own. It seemed as if it was just yesterday I was complaining about life with a toddler, but at this point Charlton is a delight to be with. He loves to read and play with me, he enjoys helping out in my chores, he doesn't mind when we have to go shopping, and he is cranky only once a day - when it's time for his nap - and I full heartily support him on his desire to rest. My favorite time of the day is when I'm working on a personal project (that sounds so serious when in fact I mean reading or writing) and he is playing quietly on his own.
Another aspect of Charlton that brings joy to me on a daily basis is his talking. He repeats a lot of the stuff that his brothers and sister say, but slowly he's adding his own personality into the mix. Here are a few funny stuff he said this week:

One afternoon I was asking him what he wanted to eat for lunch, and he kept spouting words after words in frustration. It was obvious he was having hard time finding the right words. And then all of a sudden, he slammed his hands on the kitchen table and said: I can't talk!

One morning Elijah was in the vicinity of our home running some errands for his job and so he stopped to see us. He had been driving his friend's sports car, a really loud Camero. When it was time for Elijah to leave, Charlton clang to him and wouldn't let him leave. To distract him, Elijah took him to show him the car. After a minute or so, Charlton appeared in my doorstep demanding my attention with his big eyes. He said: It was so weird, mom. Babi (father in Albanian) pushed a button in the car, and the car screamed!

I was trying to mop the kitchen floor, and Charlton was on the way "trying" to unload the dishes. I kept asking him to move and when he didn't budge I spanked his bottom. Indignantly he turned around and said: How can you? I love you.

James also likes the rain, although he doesn't like to get his feet wet. He will however play t-ball rain or shine, and since he has this contraption that allows him to play it on his own, he doesn't need anyone to accompany him. I've seen him many a times outside enjoying himself being alone and doing what he likes best.


When on a few occasions we had some sun spreading its warmth on us this week, James would take advantage of the overgrown weed area to play hide and seek with his brothers.

Now you see him...

Now you don't...
I'm glad I have James with me in the early afternoon. I'm still discovering his personality, and his strengths and weaknesses. I enjoy seeing him grow older and showing me who he is. It's funny in the mornings when I'm making lunches for my older children, and he asks if he can eat at the cafeteria. It's not that he cares for the food. Goodness, he doesn't even have to be there because his school ends right before lunch. But he wants so badly to be like his sister and brother and feel like a big boy, and so he joins the first graders and eats lunch with them, food from the cafeteria, food that my daughter thinks it's disgusting and my Jefferson throws in the trash. Ah, the joys of growing up.

We play a lot of board games together, James and I, but with Charlton wanting to join us it isn't as fun anymore. So we save time to be together when Charlton takes his nap. James's favorite past time is still reading. I think we must have read most all of the picture books at the library, because now I'm finding James expand his territory by checking out non fiction books as well. Beside having his father read Hardy Boys to him and me children's classics, James has shown interest in WWI and WWII stories and facts. He also is interested in learning about people and their lives. Here are a few of what I'm reading to James at the moment:
Speaking of James' s interest in notable people's lives, I enjoyed discussing the life of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.with him when James brought home his portrayal of this prominent figure. I love it that my children are growing up and we can actually discuss important issues now such as prejudice, racism, strength of character and integrity, and many more, and the same time you know they are getting it. I was proud of James when he told me that Dr. King must have been inspired by Heavenly Father to speak up on all of us being equal in the eyes of God.

I can't wait for Charlton to grow up and hear what wisdom he has to share with the rest of us.

What are your children interested in at the moment?

Monday, March 26, 2012

How does rain make you feel?

It has been raining on and off here in our beautiful California. We really need the rain. This year we've had very little precipitation. The sun has shined brightly all through winter. It must be this fact (having great weather all the time) that makes us stay at home when it rains. Elijah and I went on a date the other evening (and it was Saturday!) and there were very few people frequenting restaurants or walking around. Based on this unscientific fact, I can infer that I've become a California girl myself. For the past two weeks, my mornings have been spent entirely at home, and I'm happy to announce that I truly took pleasure in it. After reading to Charlton for an hour, every morning for five days in a row, I read and read and read. I finished five books in five days. I did stop to pay attention to my children, their after school activities, homework, and dinner (which I'm not ashamed to admit on occasion consisted of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches), but after they were in bed, my reading marathon would continue. You'll have to wait till the end of the month for the list and review of the books I read.

The week after didn't bring much change either. I did take care of the accumulated laundry and cooked some healthy dinners, but at night I started watching movies instead, taking a break from reading. As you might have noticed so far this year I've become obsessed with Downton Abbey, reading and watching BBC productions of any novel by Charles Dickens or George Elliot, and Shakespeare adaptations by Kenneth Branagh. As with other movies and productions before, I would stay up all night till I finished all of the episodes. This was very entertaining, but as you might have imagined a bit tiring especially when you have to chauffeur and feed four active kids the next day. Well that knowledge didn't deter me from doing the same thing this past week. Except that I obtained two new obsessions. The first one: the BBC adaptation of Sherlock Holmes mysteries into a new and amazing 21 century version. I had watched the first season some time ago and had thoroughly enjoyed it. I hadn't found the time to watch the second season, so one night I just sat and watched it all. I wasn't disappointed. With the exception of some unnecessary adult content (still in the realm of pg-13 ratings), season two was brilliantly done. I loved the plots, the energy coming from the actors--especially Benedict Cumberbatch who plays Sherlock--the costumes, the settings, and the chemistry between the two friends, Sherlock and Watson. I also think that Cumberbatch portrays Sherlock with a touch of understated humanity that makes our hearts want him to be happy. But as with most geniuses, Sherlock is misunderstood and feels alone, until Watson comes along, and they share a bond of friendship that is as unreal in appearances as it is real in their hearts. Solving mysteries and working together is just the beginning; forging that friendship is the story of this adaptation. I highly recommend it.
The other obsession I acquired still has to do with movies, this time with French movies. I spent a couple of nights being refreshed by the simplicity of the themes as well as the easy-going acting of the French actors and directors. Elijah and I like to watch foreign films, and my favorite ones are French. I remember watching The Chorus and being fascinated by it. This time I watched some movies with special themes such as having faith in yourself (Queen to Play), learning how to be a friend to others and allow you selfishness fade away (My Best Friend), believing in love by overcoming your own weaknesses (Jet Lag), being honest with yourself and others (The Valet), appreciating others even when they are different (The Dinner Game). I'll keep you posted when I find some more, and if you have some that have impressed you, let me know. Everyone loves a good movie.
Beside reading books and watching movies, I've enjoyed having lunches with friends, going on dates with Elijah, attending the temple, participating in our Relief Society activities, visiting the library, taking Charlton to story hour, driving the kids to their after-school programs, going on field trips with my kids, doing a whole lot of laundry, cleaning, cooking, and the usual. One activity in particular that I enjoyed tremendously comes to mind: Book club. My friend who was presenting Wednesday Wars assigned us each a part in Julius Caesar Act III, and everyone of us took our role very seriously, dramatized the way we felt it, and had a bunch of fun in the process. I was providently given the part of Mark Antony, truthfully my favorite part in Julius Caesar. We also discussed our favorite teachers, poignant moments in our lives, love stories, and many more. It was an unforgettable evening accompanied by delicious food and home made cream puffs. What more can one want from life!

Every new season, I feel the itch to go and shop for new outfits. It's as if I'm welcoming that new season by dressing appropriately for it. I always enjoy shopping at the stores, although I have to say shopping on-line is very tempting. This time amongst other things, I made myself buy a pair of sweat pants. I've never owned a pair before with the exception of my pregnancy free breathing pants. The reason behind my lack of desire to dress in sweatpants is the fact that I like to dress nicely at all times of the day, and so I buy only clothes that are fancy and nice. Well, staying home during the day these past weeks made me realize that I don't have any comfortable pants I can sit and read in. I have very comfortable pajamas, but I hate wearing them all day long. So the decision was made and I did buy them, although I chose a pair that wasn't just comfortable. They had to be sexy and fancy.

The other day when I got back from finishing some errands, I shockingly noticed a swarm of bees snuggling around each other on a branch in one of the trees near my parking place. I had to park in a different spot since I didn't want them to be disturbed. Elijah mentioned that they weren't our bees; this was a swarm all on its own. I was scared to get close, but not scared enough to not take one picture of this amazing phenomena.

Today we received a package from Elijah's grandmother. She had sent us each our own hat. Knowing how obsessed my children are with hats, this was a perfect gift for them. It is a blessing to have family members who are thoughtful and generous.
The forecast predicts more rain in our zone. I'm glad of it. I look forward to those quiet hours in the morning when I'm reading to Charlton or to myself, or playing Zingo for the hundredth time. Life is exciting only if you see it as such. Rain or shine, there are bound to be some thrilling experiences waiting to be discovered.

What have you been reading lately? What are your favorite movies? How do you feel when it rains?

Thursday, March 15, 2012

Beware the Ides of March

For one of the book clubs I attend, we are reading a young adult book titled "The Wednesday Wars." It's a fun little book that on the surface seems to be just that, fun, but as one continues to read it becomes more deep and it deals with an amazing group of issues. The story takes place in the 1960's during the time that America is involved with the Vietnam War. Seventh grader Holling Hoodhood thinks his English teacher hates him. Holling is the only student in the class that doesn't attend a religious class in the middle of the day on Wednesdays, so during that time Mrs. Baker assigns him to read plays by Shakespeare, starting a friendship that will help them both throughout the school year. As he reads the Bard's words and learns through the plays' themes, Holling is being transformed into a young man. The author has a light sense of humor and brings out the fun that Shakespeare produces with his wit and talent in his plays. As Holling reads one play at a time, he starts relating what he learns to his own life and his relationships with his father, girlfriend, friends, and sister. And of course one of the plays he reads is Julius Caesar. Since today is the 15th of March, or the Ides of March, I thought I would reminisce a bit about my fascination with Shakespeare, and share with you some of my favorite quotes from Julius Caesar (it would be a long post if I shared quotes from all of Shakespeare's plays).

Nobody introduced me to Shakespeare. It felt like love at first sight. My mother had a room with two walls full of books. Most of them were the great works of classical literature, all beautifully translated into Albanian. Reading was part of life, actually life itself. I remember my mother and myself reading on our own till the early hours of the morning, and then getting ready she for work and I for school. We would both be late, but that wasn't what we talked about on our way to our destinations. She would share what she read and I would share what I had read. No hardship or trial during the day could dampen our souls. I remember reading a lot of Greek Mythology and Greek plays by Aeschylus, Sophocles, and Aristophanes, in addition to short excerpts from Plato and Aristotle. Next to these my mom had placed a huge volume of Shakespeare plays. My heart thumped when I touched its leathery cover. I had heard of Shakespeare and I had watched several productions of his plays on TV, but at age 9, I hadn't read any verses from Shakespeare. I thought I would give it a try, and thus started my fascination with this genius of English literature, and I have been in love with this mysterious creature and what he had to say about life ever since.

In middle school, I made the hilarious attempt of trying to translate the Albanian version of some of the plays into English, and then compare it to the original. My brother still makes fun of me for doing such a silly thing, but I had just started reading books in English, and I was enjoying my progress with this language. This exercise gave me the confidence to read Shakespeare's works in their original language, or at least make the attempt of grasping some of what Shakespeare wrote. In high school, I was obsessed with writing down my favorite quotes from the plays. I would give anything to find that sweet notebook filled with Shakespeare sayings and best-loved quotes. I then later started memorizing and reciting various monologues, my first one being Mark Antony's speech at Julius Caesar's funeral.

It's a pity but I don't read as much Shakespeare nowadays as I used to. I have had season tickets for years at various Shakespeare Theater productions. I also love to see adaptations made for TV viewers. I grew up watching Laurence Olivier in many of those kinds of productions, and till lately I couldn't make myself watch anyone else but him in King Lear or Hamlet. However, I have to say Kenneth Branagh has come very close to that ideal. His portrayal of Hamlet is one of my favorites, coming very close to the perfection of Laurence Olivier. His Henry V carrying the young boy in his arms after the battle of Agincourt with Patrick Doyle singing Non Nobis Nomine in the background doesn't lag behind either. Just the other day I watched Branagh's adaptation of Much Ado About Nothing, and I have to say his role of Benedick portrayed better than my imagination could have ever produced made this lighthearted comedy into a masterpiece. Shakespeare's words were never uttered so beautifully.

Gillian hasn't read the original Shakespeare plays yet, but I introduced her to Shakespeare as soon as she turned 8. There are some fascinating children's adaptations of many Shakespeare plays as well as several artfully done dramatizations on books-on-CD that I've given to her, and she has devoured them with pleasure, making me tremendously happy. But I'm not pushing her. I hope she will come to Shakespeare on her own accord just as I did. Somehow I'm not worried. I have a lot of magic tricks under my sleeve, even if my husband would laugh at my attempts of guiding my kids into reading what I want them to read. Just the other day he was making fun of my seriousness when it comes to reading. The kids were getting ready to retire to bed, and I was giving my instructions to each of them about how much time they have left and what books to read. At one point I was telling Jefferson that I expected him to be half way done with his book before he went to sleep. Charlton was climbing the stairs while this conversation was taking place, and Elijah immediately called him and with my very large volume of Plato's writings in his hands he said: "Here Charlton, your mother will be disappointed if you don't finish this volume by tonight. Go and don't waste your time." Funny all around!

Back to Shakespeare. I hope that this little post has inspired some of you to pick up one of his plays and read it. My favorites are The Tempest and Hamlet, with Julius Caesar coming third. But then again, Shakespeare is a genius in all he writes. As promised, here are some of my favorite quotes from Julius Ceasar, starting with my first Shakespeare memorization ever, that of Mark Antony's eulogy:

Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ears;
I come to bury Cæsar, not to praise him.
The evil that men do lives after them;
The good is oft interred with their bones. (3.2.79)

He was my friend, faithful and just to me:
But Brutus says he was ambitious;
And Brutus is an honourable man. (3.2.91
)

You blocks, you stones, you worse than senseless things!
O you hard hearts, you cruel men of Rome,

Knew you not Pompey? (1.1.39)


Cowards die many times before their deaths;

The valiant never taste of death but once.

Of all the wonders that I yet have heard,

It seems to me most strange that men should fear;

Seeing that death, a necessary end,

Will come when it will come. (2.2.34)


O, pardon me, thou bleeding piece of earth,
That I am meek and gentle with these butchers!
Thou art the ruins of the noblest man
That ever lived in the tide of times.
Woe to the hand that shed this costly blood!
Over thy wounds now do I prophesy,--
Which, like dumb mouths, do ope their ruby lips,
To beg the voice and utterance of my tongue--
A curse shall light upon the limbs of men;
Domestic fury and fierce civil strife
Shall cumber all the parts of Italy;
Blood and destruction shall be so in use
And dreadful objects so familiar
That mothers shall but smile when they behold
Their infants quarter'd with the hands of war;
All pity choked with custom of fell deeds:
And Caesar's spirit, ranging for revenge,
With Ate by his side come hot from hell,
Shall in these confines with a monarch's voice
Cry 'Havoc,' and let slip the dogs of war;
That this foul deed shall smell above the earth
With carrion men, groaning for burial.
(Act III, Scene 1)

A friend should bear his friend's infirmities,

But Brutus makes mine greater than they are. (4.3.86)

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Braces and Fairies

Gillian got her braces this week, front teeth upper jaw. She has a bad overbite and the orthodontist was adamant about taking care of that now. She is very excited about it, but I can tell they don’t feel very comfortable. She chose color green to match her eyes, she said.


I can’t believe we’ve had to start with orthodontic work at such an early age. I thought I had a few more years of traveling before I had to use that money for dental work, but it has to be done. What is interesting is the fact that the dentist said she might need more braces at a later time. I’m just glad we live at a time when braces are hip and our needs and those of our children’s are taken seriously and meticulously.

Jefferson wasn’t outdone when it came to dental work this week. He had two more teeth pulled out to make room for his adult teeth waiting to come out. He is done for a while till his adult teeth come out, and then we’ll go from there. Hopefully this preventive step we took of pulling baby teeth out will help his adult teeth to come out straight and with enough room.

James has been saying he has FOUR baby teeth that are loose. I read him the book D.W. tricks the Tooth Fairy (where D.W. is jealous of Arthur’s fallen tooth), and then complimented him on his pearly teeth. I told him I was very proud of his diligence in brushing and flossing every night. I think he received the attention he was seeking. As for Charlton, we are just happy he lets us brush his teeth; he has no ambition in that front, at least not yet.

Gillian spent some one-on-one time with dad on Saturday. She helped him wash his truck, and then when the job was done, they drove to Jamba Juice and spent some time with each other talking and slurping their smoothies.

Jefferson also got to spend some quality time with his dad. They have been working on a computer game called Minecraft, a game of building and strategy. His friend Jack introduced Jefferson to it, and Jefferson has been obsessed with it ever since. At one point James lost their place in this web world, and Jefferson became very distressed, but Elijah searched one night all the possible ways to find your way back, and helped Jefferson get back to where he wanted to be. This made Jefferson exclaimed how grateful he was to have such a smart dad to help him and such a sweet mom to let him work on it even though it was not his computer day. James and Gillian have been enjoying it as well, but this is Jefferson’s thing with dad.

I felt bad that James messed up Jefferson’s game and because of that they were giving him hard time. I decided he needed some fun time with mom, so I took him to play for a couple of hours at a fun place called Fairyland. It’s a very small and modest version of Disney World, but it was still very fun. They say it was when he visited this park that Walt Disney came up with his idea of Disney Land many years ago. We went from one nursery rhyme landmark to another. I told James that since this was his day he could lead us anywhere he wanted. I was touched when he would say let’s go and try this and that because Charlton will like it. James’s favorite place was Captain Hook’s pirate ship where he pretended to be Peter Pan. Charlton got excited when he saw a gnome blowing bubbles, as well as Snow White surrounded by her elves. Charlton had to give his princess a hug. We ended our experience by watching a puppet show that was offered every two hours in one of the outdoor playhouses inside the park. We didn’t want to leave, but we had to pick up the older kids from school.


Charlton has been enjoying this beautiful weather by going to the park every day. I figured that after reading to him the best thing was to take him outside and let him play.

He is very funny, this one. He loves to play by himself or with friends as long as he chooses to do so. And unlike my other children who loved climbing ladders and going down slides by age 18 months, Charlton has no desire or courage to do so. He is satisfied playing in the sand box or climbing steady steps. He loves trying anything as long as his siblings are with him. Let’s hope his sense of adventure will emerge soon, otherwise I’ll have to bribe him to try new things. Although I did try just that when he was taking an awful long time going down the slide the other day, but it didn’t work. I told him I would give him one piece of candy if he went down on his own. But it didn’t do the trick. He was scared that he would fall and asked me to put my arms around the bottom of the slide. You should have seen his face as he was going down. I wouldn’t have thought Charlton would be the careful one out of my four children. His physic just doesn’t match up with this side of his personality.

I haven’t been feeling that well for a few days. I think I had a mild cold, but my whole body ached and my nose was stuffed. As a result, I didn’t feel like doing much, which is ridiculous because as the mother and the CEO of the family I can’t afford feeling like that. I had to take kids to school and after school activities, dentist appointments, grocery shopping, park, reading time, story time, and many more. So the only area I could slack was laundry. Well, as you might have guessed, even that caught up with me. One morning after the boys had taken a shower, they came downstairs with their upper body dressed and the other half wrapped in towels. They informed me that there were no more clean underwear. I sat them to eat their breakfast as they were, with towels wrapped around their bottoms, and then went and search up and down for clean underwear. Well, needless to say, there weren’t any, so I had some washed and dried. While waiting for underwear to get done, my boys played UNO with each other on the floor. It was sad, but very funny at the same time. I decided I would hide a stack of clean underwear just for these kinds of emergencies. We were late for school not more than five minutes. I’ve never washed and dried underwear in less than 15 minutes. I thought they got washed long enough, and the boys didn’t know the difference.

During my sick days, besides reading a storm, I’ve been watching good BBC productions. Since I was in a Charles Dickens reading groove, and especially after watching Nicholas Nikleby, I was happy to see that PBS was showing a new adaptation of Oliver Twist artfully done by Masterpiece Theater.

Oliver Twist was the first Charles Dickens novel I read, and I was very young then. As I watched this production, I couldn’t help sadness come inside me knowing that there was such cruelty in the world toward children. I have no doubt that it still goes on in many countries even nowadays. I’m sure that when I read this novel at my young age of 10, I thought this was just that, a novel. But today I knew and felt the meanness of people and hardships of the children then and now. After the movie, I read a few articles about Charles Dickens, and his influence in improving children’s life conditions. He truly had a lasting effect on his audiences, and it was partially through his books that Queen Victoria was introduced to the harsh realities of the working class life. Oliver Twist was the first book ever to have a child for a main character. It was a stark reminder of the harsh working conditions of young children, the poor standard of orphanages, and the deep gap, not only financially but emotionally as well, between the working class and the wealthy. However, as all of Dickens’s books do for me, Oliver Twist brought out the importance of being kind to each other regardless of color, social status or wealth. We are truly each other’s angles on earth.

March 8 is the International women’s day. In Albania, this was mostly Mother’s day. I have the fondest memory of my brother and I going and getting my mother a special gift. Even at a young age, I loved writing her cards. They are not much, just expression of love for my mother, but they mean so much to her especially now that I’m not there. We also used to get for her each year a bouquet of mimosa flowers with their sweet smell permeating the whole house. My brother, being there in Albania at the moment, had arrived yesterday at her doorstep with an armful of mimosa and then taken her out for dinner as it used to be our tradition. She had tears of joy and gratitude in her eyes.

That made me think of the little things that make us mothers happy. A note, a flower, a meal cooked with love, a kiss and a hug, a smile, an encouragement, a foot rub, an honest praise, a simple, but thoughtful gift, are but a few that make me happy as a mother.

As I was thinking about my mother yesterday, and in particular of the blessing of motherhood, I felt this clear thought and gratitude in my heart. As my children are growing up, I’ve been thinking a lot of my life and my goals and what I need to do now to get there later. I’ve felt inadequate for the work force and even going back to school sounds hard at the moment, which I thought was my forte. I felt that being a mother hadn’t helped me much in my professional development. And then the Lord sent me one of his tender mercies. I had this clear vision in my mind of the woman I had become because I had chosen to be a mother and stay home with my children. There is no professional job out there that could have helped me develop the skills and the character traits that I’ve been able to develop as I’ve served my children and my family. Those character traits are eternal and will be with me forever. I’ve not only developed strengths that make it easy for me to administer life in its practical everyday issues, but I’ve developed and continue to develop through service and stretching of myself a clear vision of what my potential as a daughter of God is. I’ve seen myself become more humble, service oriented, kinder, more patient, more loving, more forgiving, more understanding than I would have ever become if I had taken a professional job. The act of letting go of yourself and putting the needs of others above yours, the act of working hard without any immediate rewards, the becoming someone somehow invisible to the world in order to make something way more than just visible (our children), in fact eternal, is something that cannot be named or put a price tag on. Being a mother has prepared me and continues to prepare me to achieve my eternal potential. It has made me a better person. Now that is worth more than any degree on earth.

On this day when we celebrate women of yesterday and today, I salute every woman who has had an impact in my life: my mother, my mother-in-law, my friends, my teachers, my woman authors, artists, philosophers, scientists, politicians, religious leaders, my daughter, grandmothers, and cousins. Wherever you may be, may your life be enriched by someone as you have enriched mine.