My forever family

My forever family
Showing posts with label motherhood. Show all posts
Showing posts with label motherhood. Show all posts

Monday, May 14, 2012

Mother's Day week-long celebration

Last Sunday, my sweet James told me that he was sad his former Primary teacher had been having shoulder problems and was going to have surgery soon. In various occasions she had sent James by mail cards, letters and sometimes simply word puzzles (James's favorite) inside an envelope. James always felt loved then, and now he wanted to return the favor. He and I brainstormed ways we could help her feel better, and James came up with the idea of bringing her dinner, writing her 'get-well' cards, and making dessert for her. So when Monday came rolling in and the kids were done with school, homework, and swimming, James and Gillian wrote their cards, and Jefferson helped with the assembling of the dinner. (Charlton enjoyed participating in our service project by eating a cookie.) His teacher was very grateful for our thoughtfulness and kindness, but what makes me even happier was the fact that my kids are learning to think of others and giving of themselves. I know from personal experience that sincere service brings true happiness to the giver and the receiver. I hope this desire to help others continues throughout their lives.

On Tuesday, we cleaned the whole house, did laundry, went grocery shopping, attended swim practice, participated in chorus (Gillian), visited the library, and ate out. On Tuesdays Elijah serves in the temple till after 10 p.m., so the children and I try to finish as many chores and fun activities as possible, so when Wednesday comes we can spend time with dad. And since he isn't home all day that day, the kids help out with his chores as well. Here is Charlton taking care of watering the garden all by himself (he wouldn't let you even if you wanted to help):

On Wednesday, since it is short day for them at school, the children had a play date for a couple of hours. After that, we each found our own little corner and either napped or read. It was a beautiful day outside so we each fought who would use hammock first. Charlton and I decided to take a nap there. Afterwards, Gillian used it to relax and write in her journal.

After dinner, Elijah and the children spent some time together reading, playing and later watching an episode of Star Trek. My mother and I went out and watched "The Avengers" (one of the best action movies I've seen in a long time), followed by dessert and discussion, a family tradition. I was grateful to Elijah for taking care of the children while I was out. Life is such a beautiful thing when we share it with others. I'm grateful for my husband who so sweetly wants to be with his family at all times, and enjoys being with us. I also know he wanted to spend the evening with me that night, but desiring to make my mother happy he encouraged us to have a good time.

Thursday came full throttle with homework, swim practice, piano, Gillian's friend 's play, and preparations for the next day's trip. Elijah had made plans to take me up to Ashland, Oregon's Shakespeare Festival for a relaxing week-end with him as a Mother's Day gift.

However, adventures awaited us even before we departed for our trip. During the play's intermission, as we were waiting for Gillian's friend's play to continue, I noticed that James's face had begun to swell and burst into a hive. I became frightened, so I asked my friend about it. The more we looked at James the more we became convinced that he had some kind of rash and needed immediate attention. Her husband, who is a doctor, checked him really quickly and stated that it looked like James had strep throat. He prescribed some penicillin, told me James would be okay as long as he took his medicine, and then suggested that I follow my week-end plans without reservations.

I was worried leaving James sick, but my mother promised me she would take good care of him, so the next day, on Friday, Elijah and I headed to Ashland. The scenery toward Oregon was very beautiful with green rolling hills and vast orchard fields. Mount Shasta stood majestic as we left California and entered Oregon.
Ashland itself was a small, quaint town with a nice university and plenty of wonderful things to do. Of course, it is well known all over America and in the world for its first class Shakespearean entertainment. The festival runs year around with shows from Shakespeare and other classics, being played each afternoon and evening. Elijah, as always, had outdone himself - from finding a very relaxing and luxurious hotel room (with its own jacuzzi) to buying the best seats in the theater to making reservation to a fancy French restaurant. I felt not only loved and cared for, but truly spoiled. Thank you, Elijah. You are one in a million.

We watched Romeo and Juliet with a different kind of take from its usual productions. The story was set during the 1840's Alta California and the young couple's families had a feud over land. It was unusual but in a very good way. I had seen this play a few times before, but I really liked this production. Having lived in California for a couple of years now and having studied its history alongside Gillian, the way the play was set out was very refreshing. I enjoyed the acting tremendously, especially Romeo's portrayal. In the past, I had seen him a bit older and more mature than Shakespeare had intended it to be, so when you would hear what he had to say about Rosaline and then Juliet, they all sounded cheesy. But this Romeo was beautifully done. The audience fell in love with his young and naive affections, his playful heart and sweet spirits, and then we all fell tears falling as Romeo cries over his misfortunes and the misunderstood death of his love, following her with his own death. Shakespeare would have been proud of that Romeo.

Beside watching plays, eating good food, and relaxing in the jacuzzi, Elijah and I enjoyed walking about town and taking in the scenery that it had to offer.

When we came back on Sunday, my mother had made a special dinner for us, the kids all were well and excited, and we were rested and refreshed. After dinner, we shared our gifts with them and they gave me their homemade cards and gifts that they had bought with dad a few days before. This had been a wonderful week full of love and kindness. I'm grateful to be a mother and to have the children I have. Without reservation, being a mother has made me a much better person than I could have ever become on my own.

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Braces and Fairies

Gillian got her braces this week, front teeth upper jaw. She has a bad overbite and the orthodontist was adamant about taking care of that now. She is very excited about it, but I can tell they don’t feel very comfortable. She chose color green to match her eyes, she said.


I can’t believe we’ve had to start with orthodontic work at such an early age. I thought I had a few more years of traveling before I had to use that money for dental work, but it has to be done. What is interesting is the fact that the dentist said she might need more braces at a later time. I’m just glad we live at a time when braces are hip and our needs and those of our children’s are taken seriously and meticulously.

Jefferson wasn’t outdone when it came to dental work this week. He had two more teeth pulled out to make room for his adult teeth waiting to come out. He is done for a while till his adult teeth come out, and then we’ll go from there. Hopefully this preventive step we took of pulling baby teeth out will help his adult teeth to come out straight and with enough room.

James has been saying he has FOUR baby teeth that are loose. I read him the book D.W. tricks the Tooth Fairy (where D.W. is jealous of Arthur’s fallen tooth), and then complimented him on his pearly teeth. I told him I was very proud of his diligence in brushing and flossing every night. I think he received the attention he was seeking. As for Charlton, we are just happy he lets us brush his teeth; he has no ambition in that front, at least not yet.

Gillian spent some one-on-one time with dad on Saturday. She helped him wash his truck, and then when the job was done, they drove to Jamba Juice and spent some time with each other talking and slurping their smoothies.

Jefferson also got to spend some quality time with his dad. They have been working on a computer game called Minecraft, a game of building and strategy. His friend Jack introduced Jefferson to it, and Jefferson has been obsessed with it ever since. At one point James lost their place in this web world, and Jefferson became very distressed, but Elijah searched one night all the possible ways to find your way back, and helped Jefferson get back to where he wanted to be. This made Jefferson exclaimed how grateful he was to have such a smart dad to help him and such a sweet mom to let him work on it even though it was not his computer day. James and Gillian have been enjoying it as well, but this is Jefferson’s thing with dad.

I felt bad that James messed up Jefferson’s game and because of that they were giving him hard time. I decided he needed some fun time with mom, so I took him to play for a couple of hours at a fun place called Fairyland. It’s a very small and modest version of Disney World, but it was still very fun. They say it was when he visited this park that Walt Disney came up with his idea of Disney Land many years ago. We went from one nursery rhyme landmark to another. I told James that since this was his day he could lead us anywhere he wanted. I was touched when he would say let’s go and try this and that because Charlton will like it. James’s favorite place was Captain Hook’s pirate ship where he pretended to be Peter Pan. Charlton got excited when he saw a gnome blowing bubbles, as well as Snow White surrounded by her elves. Charlton had to give his princess a hug. We ended our experience by watching a puppet show that was offered every two hours in one of the outdoor playhouses inside the park. We didn’t want to leave, but we had to pick up the older kids from school.


Charlton has been enjoying this beautiful weather by going to the park every day. I figured that after reading to him the best thing was to take him outside and let him play.

He is very funny, this one. He loves to play by himself or with friends as long as he chooses to do so. And unlike my other children who loved climbing ladders and going down slides by age 18 months, Charlton has no desire or courage to do so. He is satisfied playing in the sand box or climbing steady steps. He loves trying anything as long as his siblings are with him. Let’s hope his sense of adventure will emerge soon, otherwise I’ll have to bribe him to try new things. Although I did try just that when he was taking an awful long time going down the slide the other day, but it didn’t work. I told him I would give him one piece of candy if he went down on his own. But it didn’t do the trick. He was scared that he would fall and asked me to put my arms around the bottom of the slide. You should have seen his face as he was going down. I wouldn’t have thought Charlton would be the careful one out of my four children. His physic just doesn’t match up with this side of his personality.

I haven’t been feeling that well for a few days. I think I had a mild cold, but my whole body ached and my nose was stuffed. As a result, I didn’t feel like doing much, which is ridiculous because as the mother and the CEO of the family I can’t afford feeling like that. I had to take kids to school and after school activities, dentist appointments, grocery shopping, park, reading time, story time, and many more. So the only area I could slack was laundry. Well, as you might have guessed, even that caught up with me. One morning after the boys had taken a shower, they came downstairs with their upper body dressed and the other half wrapped in towels. They informed me that there were no more clean underwear. I sat them to eat their breakfast as they were, with towels wrapped around their bottoms, and then went and search up and down for clean underwear. Well, needless to say, there weren’t any, so I had some washed and dried. While waiting for underwear to get done, my boys played UNO with each other on the floor. It was sad, but very funny at the same time. I decided I would hide a stack of clean underwear just for these kinds of emergencies. We were late for school not more than five minutes. I’ve never washed and dried underwear in less than 15 minutes. I thought they got washed long enough, and the boys didn’t know the difference.

During my sick days, besides reading a storm, I’ve been watching good BBC productions. Since I was in a Charles Dickens reading groove, and especially after watching Nicholas Nikleby, I was happy to see that PBS was showing a new adaptation of Oliver Twist artfully done by Masterpiece Theater.

Oliver Twist was the first Charles Dickens novel I read, and I was very young then. As I watched this production, I couldn’t help sadness come inside me knowing that there was such cruelty in the world toward children. I have no doubt that it still goes on in many countries even nowadays. I’m sure that when I read this novel at my young age of 10, I thought this was just that, a novel. But today I knew and felt the meanness of people and hardships of the children then and now. After the movie, I read a few articles about Charles Dickens, and his influence in improving children’s life conditions. He truly had a lasting effect on his audiences, and it was partially through his books that Queen Victoria was introduced to the harsh realities of the working class life. Oliver Twist was the first book ever to have a child for a main character. It was a stark reminder of the harsh working conditions of young children, the poor standard of orphanages, and the deep gap, not only financially but emotionally as well, between the working class and the wealthy. However, as all of Dickens’s books do for me, Oliver Twist brought out the importance of being kind to each other regardless of color, social status or wealth. We are truly each other’s angles on earth.

March 8 is the International women’s day. In Albania, this was mostly Mother’s day. I have the fondest memory of my brother and I going and getting my mother a special gift. Even at a young age, I loved writing her cards. They are not much, just expression of love for my mother, but they mean so much to her especially now that I’m not there. We also used to get for her each year a bouquet of mimosa flowers with their sweet smell permeating the whole house. My brother, being there in Albania at the moment, had arrived yesterday at her doorstep with an armful of mimosa and then taken her out for dinner as it used to be our tradition. She had tears of joy and gratitude in her eyes.

That made me think of the little things that make us mothers happy. A note, a flower, a meal cooked with love, a kiss and a hug, a smile, an encouragement, a foot rub, an honest praise, a simple, but thoughtful gift, are but a few that make me happy as a mother.

As I was thinking about my mother yesterday, and in particular of the blessing of motherhood, I felt this clear thought and gratitude in my heart. As my children are growing up, I’ve been thinking a lot of my life and my goals and what I need to do now to get there later. I’ve felt inadequate for the work force and even going back to school sounds hard at the moment, which I thought was my forte. I felt that being a mother hadn’t helped me much in my professional development. And then the Lord sent me one of his tender mercies. I had this clear vision in my mind of the woman I had become because I had chosen to be a mother and stay home with my children. There is no professional job out there that could have helped me develop the skills and the character traits that I’ve been able to develop as I’ve served my children and my family. Those character traits are eternal and will be with me forever. I’ve not only developed strengths that make it easy for me to administer life in its practical everyday issues, but I’ve developed and continue to develop through service and stretching of myself a clear vision of what my potential as a daughter of God is. I’ve seen myself become more humble, service oriented, kinder, more patient, more loving, more forgiving, more understanding than I would have ever become if I had taken a professional job. The act of letting go of yourself and putting the needs of others above yours, the act of working hard without any immediate rewards, the becoming someone somehow invisible to the world in order to make something way more than just visible (our children), in fact eternal, is something that cannot be named or put a price tag on. Being a mother has prepared me and continues to prepare me to achieve my eternal potential. It has made me a better person. Now that is worth more than any degree on earth.

On this day when we celebrate women of yesterday and today, I salute every woman who has had an impact in my life: my mother, my mother-in-law, my friends, my teachers, my woman authors, artists, philosophers, scientists, politicians, religious leaders, my daughter, grandmothers, and cousins. Wherever you may be, may your life be enriched by someone as you have enriched mine.

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

My Reading for October

1. The Giver by Lois Lowry
After reading Hunger Games and Matched (and previously Brave New World), I understand the dystopian genre better. The Giver seems to be the one book that these other ones rely on and have based their stories upon. One of my favorite books dealing with dystopian issues is Fahrenheit 451. To this day I'm amazed that the communist regime in my country allowed it to be translated, because it is the very book that made me understand communism and personal freedoms vs. community sameness. The Giver deals with this kind of issues but from a 12 year old's point of view. The society in which Jonas lives has eliminated pain and emotional distress by having everyone be the same, eat the same foods, have the same schedules, etc, basically everything is taken care by the governing council. There is only one person in that community that has all of the memories and understanding of life as it were before. Jonas was chosen to replace him. He had to start his training consisting on transferring all of the memories from the Giver to him. He had to feel pain and joy, and many other feelings that were taken away genetically in order for the society to be peaceful and experience no strife. I liked the individual details that Lowry added to the story such as the color idea, and love and music senses. Having lived under a dytopian society myself, I felt the book lacked logic in explaining certain things. As human beings we are born with a desire to be independent and have in us a curiosity about life that no matter how strict governments become we can overcome. This book didn't give much of an explanation on how these human beings with hearts and minds of their own had become robots. Nevertheless, thinking that the author had meant the book to be a metaphorical story rather than historical account of dystopian societies, I really enjoyed it. A good book for middle age kids to read and discuss about individual freedoms and the consequences of abusing them or giving them away.

2. The Blind Contessa's new machine by Carey Wallace
This was such a beautifully written book, and the plot was so promising. I just wished the author had worked her characters more and given them depth. The Young Italian Contessa, Carolina Fantoni, is discovering in her twenties that her vision is slowly disappearing. No one believes her, neither her parents, nor her gorgeous fiance. But her eccentric best friend, Torri, has always taken her seriously and understands her as she tries to describe how her vision is fading away. A stronger friendship develops and as Carolina's vision vanishes completely, Torri, who has fallen in love with her and the wonderful person she is, invents a machine with which Contessa Fentoni can type letters to him. Thus, we have the invention of the first type writer. The story is true, and the names stand for actual people. The description that the author shares through the now completely blind Carolina, as the Contessa has dreams of color and full of life, are breathtaking. However, I wished Ms. Wallace had developed those characters more and given them true life. Mostly we know about the characters through the statements that the author is making about them, instead of understanding them through dialogue and behavior. And I didn't like the ending at all. Now you have to read it to see what happens. Go ahead, it's a good read, regardless of the few flaws I mentioned.

3. The Boy with striped pajamas by John Boyne
A story about the Holocaust, written from a young boy's perspective. Bruno is the son of the German commander who is assigned to watch and deal with the Jews in Auschwitz. There Bruno, unaware of what's going on inside the camp, makes a friend outside of the fence, a Jewish little boy of the same age. And there starts the story of friendship that knows no boundaries, although it is a friendship that consists of two boys from different sides of a fence. It is elegantly written without showing the horrors of that deathly place, but at the same time it encourages thought and emotion in the readers' mind and heart. This book isn't meant to be an historical account of what happened to the Jews in Auschwitz. It is written more as a fable for us to feel the importance of love and kindness. Judgements thrown because of someone's religion, race, or nationality will always bring up fences, and those fences can only pull people apart and destroy. A good book for any age, and especially a simple way to introduce the Holocaust to young readers.

4. The Sweetness at the bottom of the pie by Alan Bradley
I'm positively, utterly, and completely an Agatha Christi fan. When it comes to mystery, she is the queen. I love her descriptions, her plots, her characters, her heroes, her antagonists, and above all the intelligence she puts in her mysteries. I've read a great many mystery authors, but no one has ever come close to her, till... well till I read Alan Bradley's book. Just so you know how much I enjoyed this author, let me tell you that I put on hold all of his other books that I could find. The sweetness at the bottom of the pie is a mystery novel, but written as if it were a classic. I loved everything about it. I loved the story set in the English country side. I thoroughly enjoyed each character, especially the 12 year-old Flavia, who not only is brilliant and has an amazingly deductive mind, but who is an eccentric, mature and hilarious girl. And I especially loved the writing, so flowing, full of metaphors and just beautiful. The mystery wasn't the main theme in this book; it wasn't to me what kept me reading. It was the characters, their interaction with each other, and above all the language. I was thoroughly amazed at the way this author expressed himself. And if you love chemistry, true chemistry and not Harry Potter magic, this book makes you want to go and open your high school chemistry texts to follow along just to enjoy the beauty of this world and how everything is so beautifully connected to each other, and just simply to understand Flavia's obsession with different kinds of poison. Enjoy!

5. A guide to art edited by Sandro Sproccati
Since I've been writing about my trip to Europe these past few weeks, I felt the need and the desire to flip through some art books that I own. It's hard to find good art books. I like mine big, with lots of illustrations and art prints corresponding to the artists, as well as an historically written account of the art periods. That's how I like to study art. Nevertheless, since I was reading a bunch of other books, and I still had the desire to dig into some art info on my own, I grabbed this book and kept it in the car. It's small and can fit in my purse, but it has a lot of pictures and information. A good compromise for me to read between waiting for doctor appointments or while resting between cooking or cleaning. I love having books like that with me at all times, just in case I don't have enough time or concentration for the ones I'm actually reading. Charlton and I enjoyed looking at the pictures while waiting on the older kids finishing their activities. What kind of books do you keep in your car for quick reading?

6. The Feminine Mystique by Betty Friedman
A very interesting book dealing with the issue of the role of women at home and in the society at large. It was written in the 60's and the audience for which it was written toward was the middle class women who after having raised their kids and sent them to school, were trying to find satisfaction and fulfillment in their role as housewives. Betty Friedman's challenge to these women was to get out of their depression and alcoholic habits, and do something about their lives. It was meant to be a wake up call for these educated women who had put their lives on hold because the society had told them that they could feel happy if they had a good husband, well behaved children, a beautiful home and helping out with social activities, and nothing more. Friedman is challenging them to look deep inside them and see what makes them happy. She is trying to open their minds, and mentality of the society itself, by reminding these women that vacuuming all day, washing dishes from morning till night, and going to lunches with friends isn't what life is all about. Women are mothers, wives, and friends, but they are also individuals. Starting a feminine revolution in the idea that it's okay to want more from life than just vacuuming, she also was very determined to point out that they loosing their intellect with drudgery while they could put it in good use by becoming engineers, scientists, politicians wasn't the way to go. I can only imagine how much of a break-through this book must have been at that time. Although today we as women have more options that those then, I still find young women who feel trapped between ideologies, be those social or religious, and who have hard time being happy, be that working outside the home or inside. I don't agree with everything Betty Friedman is saying, and especially with the condescending tone she expressed herself toward the stay-at-home moms. But I understand the historical background she was writing this book. These educated women had been fed the fairy tale of staying home and fulfilling their role as housewives, (but doing nothing to improve their own education or increase their knowledge,) would make them happy. Let me be clear about my own feelings on this very important topic. I believe that the most important role, job or calling, whatever you want to call it, for women of this world is that of motherhood. There is nothing more beautiful for me to be with my family and raise my children to become well rounded individuals. That is primarily in my hands, and I don't see it only as a responsibility but a privilege that brings me joy, whether that be teaching my kids how to vacuum, wash bathrooms, or read Shakespeare with me. I find joy in everything I do and teach my children. That said I feel very strongly that I am also an individual who needs learning and growing each day. Some women find their growth by working, some by serving, and some by reading, and who knows in how many other ways. The most important thing for me is that I give it my best in whatever I'm doing, and never neglect the continuous education of my mind and spirit. I always feel that I'm the most happy when I have given my best in all I do, whether that be as a mother or as just Melita. President Hinckley advised us all to:

"Now, be faithful, be true, go forward, be ambitious. Don't short-circuit yourself. Don't stop now. Keep growing. Keep going. Educate your minds and your spirits and never lose sight of the fact that you are a child of God with a divine destiny and capability of doing great and good and wonderful things. Don't sell yourselves short. Don't cheapen yourselves. You know who you are. Each of you knows that you are a child of God and that your Heavenly Father expects something great and noble and good of you... You just have to do your very best with all the capability you have. You have to do your very best. And somehow, if you do that, God will open the way before you and the sun will shine, and your lives will be fruitful and you will accomplish great good in the world in which you take a part."

Let me also share with you a quote from President Faust concerning us women. When Gillian was born I had part of this quote posted on the wall. Somehow I don't think it was for Gillian. Being a first time mother was hard for me, but keeping the big vision before my eyes helped me be a much better mother than I could have ever thought. Finding joy while doing it was the crowning blessing of it all.

"As daughters of God, you cannot imagine the divine potential within each of you. Surely the secret citadel of women’s inner strength is spirituality... You sisters do not know the full extent of your influence. You sisters enrich all of humanity. All human life begins with you. Each woman brings her own separate, unique strengths to the family and the Church. Being a daughter of God means that if you seek it, you can find your true identity. You will know who you are. This will make you free—not free from restraints, but free from doubts, anxieties, or peer pressure. You will not need to worry, “Do I look all right?” “Do I sound OK?” “What do people think of me?” A conviction that you are a daughter of God gives you a feeling of comfort in your self-worth. It means that you can find strength in the balm of Christ. It will help you meet the heartaches and challenges with faith and serenity."

Sunday, May 8, 2011

Being a full-time mother is one of the highest salaried jobs in my field, since the payment is pure love. ~Mildred B. Vermont

I was woken up this morning by the angelic voices of my children led by their father. Elijah had set the alarm clock the night before, but he shouldn't have. All my children had woken way early (around 6 am) to cook breakfast for their mother. I heard them in my sleep as they tiptoed into my room and tried to wake up their father. They were so excited. The breakfast was ready when they came in my room about 7:30 am singing "I often go walking," one of my favorite mother songs. From then on, it didn't matter how the day would turn out, I had had angels sing to me.

Last night when I went with my mom to attend the ballet program, Elijah had taken them shopping. Each year for Mother/Father's day and birthdays, we take the children the day before shopping for their parent. It's a tradition that my children look forward each holiday. So breakfast was delicious with everything that the children wanted me to have. I truly appreciated their kindness and thoughtfulness.

After breakfast, the children each gave me a special handmade and very thoughtful gift prepared by themselves. They had prepared it at school and had been very excited to give it to me the whole week-end. I knew it was hard for them to not show it to me right away, but they truly kept their secret. Gillian was upset that she didn't have her gift (she had left it at school), so yesterday I saw her take a few minutes in her room and make something for me. She told me that it was something that I would love. Just looking at them during the whole week-end get so excited and try so hard to make me happy made my heart full.

Gillian had written some poetry for me. The first three were dedicated to me, the fourth one was a lullaby written by Gillian for me to sing to Charlton. She even sang it to me, her eyes bright with pride.


1. How much I love you

I love you more than water,
When around you, I have no cares
The food I eat is no match for your kisses and cares
Your hair is as black as midnight
and your deep green eyes stare with love
When I look deep inside you I see pure love
It makes me want to kiss you with true, true love!

2. All beauty is no match for you

Your laugh is full of music
your heart the purest gold
your eyes as bright as sunshine
your nose as true as you
your mouth no match for mine
the stars can't compare to you
You are completely mine.

3. When you wake up in the morning

I rush into the room giggling with glee
Happiness lights my happy face
I tiptoe up behind you
and with a playful shake
I wake you and yell.....
Happy Mother's Day to you

4. The little baby, shhhh!

A mother sits with a little baby and sings a lullaby:

Go to sleep little one
the day is done.
Mother is sitting nigh
I love you sweet one
but the day is done.
Lay down your head and sleep
The birds are gone, the cattle too.
You now must sleep
Oh, how I love you and you love me.
Now you will sleep.

Jefferson was very proud of his gift. It totally suited this list-making boy of mine.



Top 10 Reasons Why I Love My MOM

10. I love my Mom because she reads me 100 books every day
9. I love my Mom because she helps me do my homework
8. I love my Mom when she makes me laugh by tickling me
7. I love my Mom because she taught me how to read
6. I love to hear my Mom sing the opera
5. I love my Mom because she finds time to play board games
4. I know my Mom cares because she loves me.
3. I know my Mom is smart because she knows everything
2. I love my Mom because she works hard at working.
1. I love my Mom because she's the BEST MOM EVER!

James was so very proud of his gift that he had made at Pre-K.



As for Charlton, Gillian had taken the time to help him with a project as well.



After church, I went into my room because my children wanted to cook a surprise lunch. They told me it had four courses and was going to be delicious. I had yummy hamburgers, corn on the cob, grilled pineapple, and banana pudding pie, all of which had been chosen by my children because they remembered me liking them. I was so touched.

And then, my children gave me the best gift ever, which every mom wants and needs, a four hour nap. I had stayed up very late the night before, and so this was a well timed gift. Here is a picture of me after my long nap, with no trace of make-up and with puffy eyes, but in possession of the greatest treasure on earth, my precious children.

I've left Elijah's gift for last. I didn't expect any presents from Elijah this Mother's Day, since he is buying me a whopping ticket to Europe for the summer. Nevertheless, Elijah managed to surprise me yet another time. He got me a professional level camera, which I've been coveted for so very long. I was speechless and absolutely touched by my husband's kindness and thoughtfulness.

I am glad that we have Mother/Father's day, not only for us parents, but for our children as well. Seeing the joy in my children's eyes made my heart full of happiness.

I love being a mother. At times I'm frustrated and discouraged that I haven't been able to finish my book, or get my degree, or do "something" with my life. And then, I imagine myself away from my children doing what I think I want to do, and then I feel sorrow in my heart. I so enjoy teaching, reading, playing with my kids. I love being there for them telling me what they feel, how their day went, and share their inspirations for the future. I feel blessed seeing them make the right choices and wanting to be like Jesus. I enjoy the small moments when Gillian tells me in passing how happy she is to have me as her mother who cares for her enough to sacrifice her life for her (exact words); I cherish the many times when James takes my face in his hands and tells me I'm beautiful; I will keep in my heart those instances when Jefferson would tell his friends how his mom is the smartest. My life is beautiful and precious because my children make it such. I'm grateful to be a mother.

President David O. McKay (1873–1970):
[The] ability and willingness properly to rear children, the gift to love, and eagerness … to express it in soul development, make motherhood the noblest office or calling in the world. She who can paint a masterpiece or write a book that will influence millions deserves the admiration and the plaudits of mankind; but she who rears successfully a family of healthy, beautiful sons and daughters, whose influence will be felt through generations to come, … deserves the highest honor that man can give, and the choicest blessings of God” (Gospel Ideals [1954], 453–54).

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Happy Women's month!

In 1911, on March 8th, women all over Europe went out demonstrating their political rights. With the coming of WWI and II, those issues went hiding, but during the 50's and the women's liberation of the 60's this issue was put into the front page of our nation's attention. In 1978, in California, a small group of educators decided to have a week of celebrating and remembering women and their contributions. The week was chosen to be the first week of March so it could coincide with March 8th of the initial ' women's revolution.' Three years later, the congress declared the first week of March, the National Women's History Week. In 1987, the Congress expanded it to the whole month of March.

I personally think it's great that we dedicate a whole month into learning and celebrating women's accomplishments throughout the world. It's important for our sons and daughters to be reminded that although men were dominant in the past in most areas of life, women did make immense contributions to those fields. Literature, being my favorite subject, comes to mind. Poems of the Greek poetess Sappho and Scheherazade's Arabian nights were my first introduction to the wit and care demonstrated by women. Growing up I fell in love with stories about Cleopatra, Sacajawea, Abigail Adams, Annie Oakley, Marie Curie, Amelia Earhart, Rosa Parks, and many more. As I've continued to read and learn, I've been attracted to female authors that through their pen were able to paint pictures of strong women characters. Elisabeth Bennett of Jane Austen, Anne Shirley of Montgomery, Margaret Hale of Elisabeth Gaskill, Jane Eyre of Charlotte Bronte, Mrs. Ramsay and Lili Briscoe of Virginia Woolf, are but a few that have mesmerized my imagination through out the years. Their independent spirits have contributed into making who I am. Their achievements have given me strength. Thus, I feel great when schools dedicate this month into teaching our children about great women of science, history, art, politics and all the other fields of life.

It is interesting to note that while growing up in Albania, a country known for its dichotomy of having a serious dictatorship and an equality between men and women, I remember celebrating March 8th with great joy. What is interesting about this, it's the fact that that date was our Mother's day. My brother and I would always look for Mimosa, a sweet smelling bright yellow flower blossoming during this month, to give to our mother. The whole country had the day off, and families would go for walks celebrating Mother's Day as a family. After all is said and done, the greatest achievement that any woman can make is her love, service and care she gives to her family. My relationship with my husband and my children is what gives me the greatest satisfaction. It is important that my children know that although I strive to be well educated and hard working in many areas of my life, it is being a mother that I really take seriously. It is an eternal and divine responsibility, and there is no other achievement in this life that will top that.

Here is to Motherhood, Womanhood, and all that we do!

"I'm strong. I'm invincible. I am woman!" - Helen Reddy
Here is her song:

Thursday, February 10, 2011

An off day that only sweets can fix

You know you are doing well as a mother, when, while with friends and not accompanied by your children, you:

1. Count out loud along with the walking man on the crossroad signal - 5 4 3 2 1 Blast Off!

2. You are driving with your friend, and you spot a firetruck or dump truck, and you tell your friend "Look, a firetruck!"

3. While driving in the car by yourself, you unconsciously change Elton John's lyrics from 'Rocket man' to 'Rocket math.'

4. As you leave your friends, you throw them a kiss and you tell your friends that you love them.

You know you've lost it and you need a break when you are supposed to pick up your child at 12:40 at your friend's house, and you completely have spaced that pick up out, and are reminded only when your friend calls you at 1:35 while you are shopping leisurely at Costco. Many apologies to Amy for being patient and kind toward me and not calling me a bad mother and friend.

I felt so badly today after this happened. I cried the whole time while driving to pick James up. I couldn't believe I had forgotten about James, and I felt miserable that I did such a thing to Amy, who has just adopted a little 4 month old baby and is trying to find pockets of time to rest and adjust to this new addition to her family. Again, Amy, I hope you can forgive me. I would never in a hundred years take advantage of any of my friends and leave my children for them to take care. I can't believe this happened to me and I still don't understand how I could have slipped. I could blame it only on my fatigue and the busy schedule of dropping off and picking up my children and mom so many times a day. One thing for sure, I needed some rest.

Instead, I went to the Recipe Exchange that my friends and I organize every month. I thought that being with friends and sharing with them what I felt would help. It did, but I still feel very embarrassed and shocked that something like that happened to me.

This month, we were bringing Valentine treats. I really wanted to make my so very yummy sweetheart trifle, but considering the lack of time and energy, I cooked another delicious, but quick dessert, Glazed Mint Brownies. It should like this:

but I didn't have time to wait for the cake to fully cool down, so instead it looked like this:

Either way, this was an easy and absolutely delicious dessert. I'm not a person that likes sweets a lot, nevertheless I had three pieces way before I got to my friend's house. It helped with the sour mood I was all day. I'm sharing the recipe with you in hopes that it will cheer you up as well in days like I had today.

Glazed Mint Brownies

Ingredients

  • 2 ounces unsweetened chocolate
  • 1/2 cup butter
  • 2 eggs
  • 1 cup sugar
  • 1/2 cup all-purpose flour

  • FILLING:
  • 3 tablespoons butter, softened
  • 1-1/2 cups confectioners' sugar
  • 2 tablespoons milk
  • 3/4 teaspoon peppermint extract
  • 3 to 4 drops green food coloring, optional

  • GLAZE:
  • 1/2 cup semisweet chocolate chips
  • 2 tablespoons butter

Directions

  • In a microwave, melt chocolate and butter; stir until smooth. Cool slightly. In a large bowl, beat the eggs, sugar and flour until blended. Stir in the chocolate mixture.
  • Pour into a greased 9-in. square baking pan. Bake at 350° for 20-25 minutes or until a toothpick inserted near the center comes out clean. Cool on a wire rack.
  • In a small bowl, beat the filling ingredients until creamy. Spread over brownies.
  • For glaze, in a microwave, melt chocolate chips and butter; stir until smooth. Spread over filling. Refrigerate until filling and glaze are set. Yield: 12-16 brownies.